When a customer throws a tantrum, they can get a lot of things done.
They can take a nap or get dressed and then call it a day.
They’re less likely to throw things at the office, get fired, or get hurt.
But they’re also less likely than people who are not angry to take a spill.
That’s because anger can make you act out.
To keep things civil, you need to understand how anger impacts your ability to act.
And you need a way to manage it.
Disruptive anger can cause you to do things that you wouldn’t otherwise be willing to do, like not answering phone calls, cancelling a meeting, or not paying for something.
If you’re angry, it can make it difficult to work, because you’re less motivated to be productive and more motivated to get angry.
You’re less able to focus and be efficient.
And if you’re not angry, you can be more difficult to manage.
If that’s the case, how do you manage a disruptive anger?
Here are five tips for managing anger effectively.
Get the facts on disruptive anger.
In the past few years, research has shown that people who report that they’re having a lot more disruptions in their lives are more likely to be angry.
This is consistent with research showing that people tend to have more disruptions when they’re stressed, depressed, and have problems with interpersonal relationships.
So it makes sense that people with more disruptive anger are more often being affected by their anger than people with less disruptive anger, and more likely than those with low levels of anger to be suffering from emotional disorders, such as anxiety, depression, and PTSD.
People who have higher levels of emotional and/or behavioral control over their emotions, including anger, are more able to manage disruptive anger in ways that make sense.
People with more emotional and behavioral control, such to being calm and peaceful, can be much more flexible when it comes to managing anger.
Don’t let it get out of control.
There are plenty of ways to handle disruptive anger: calm it down, say, “No problem, I’m just going to take this time to look at my emails and make sure that I’m responding to the customer,” or offer help.
These responses are generally effective, but they may not be helpful if the person is not calm.
If a person with anger isn’t paying attention, offering helpful information, or communicating with the customer, they’re likely to escalate their frustration.
Let it go.
While there are ways to deal with anger in a way that is respectful, they usually don’t address the root cause of the anger, which is that you’ve been treated poorly, and you’re upset because you’ve felt treated unfairly.
If your anger is rooted in something negative that has happened in the past, you’re likely already suffering from anger management problems and have been denied the opportunity to work through those issues.
Be kind and helpful.
There’s no substitute for kindness, and it’s important to let people know that you’re okay with being upset about the way you feel, and that you appreciate their concern.
If someone is upset, they need to feel understood and supported.
If people are upset, it’s often because they feel like their experience with you has been unfair.
This can lead to feelings of helplessness, frustration, and anger.
Embracing and supporting people who need support, rather than judging them or treating them unfairly, is important to improving your ability as a manager.
And while we often talk about how important it is to be kind, when it’s your anger that is causing your unhappiness, it may be even more important to understand and be kind to yourself.
Read more about how anger management can improve your life, and how to manage anger at the Anxiety and Bipolar blog.